Like anything in pro wrestling, there are greats and not-so-greats. Tag teams are no exception as there have been some truly great teams in the pantheon of pro wrestling, but there have been many more horrible teams in comparison to the good ones. A team can be a failure for any number of reasons such as having a bad gimmick, wrestlers who are not compatible with one another, or the team just does not connect with the fans. It is these reasons that make or break the cohesiveness of a team, leading them to ultimately breaking up or going through a gimmick change that will hopefully find better success with the crowd. These teams on this list are worse than bottom of the barrel; they are not even in the barrel. These teams are what people point to as the cause of downtrend of tag team wrestling that has occurred at various points over the years.
In order to come up with this ranking, the teams mentioned were graded primarily on how awful their gimmick was, though their in-ring ability was considered, though a few of these teams could hold their own inside the ring but they were just weighed down by terrible gimmicks. These are the kind of teams that make you scratch your head and wonder what creative was thinking when they came up with the gimmick. While there may have been the right jumping off point for a team by having solid workers as part of it, the overall gimmick and how they did not work well together ultimately brought the team down to sludge level.
So please read, enjoy, and let us know what you think down in the comments section. How would you have ranked these differently? Are there other teams that you felt should have made the list or that one of the entries should be ranked differently?
15. High Energy
I honestly do not know why the WWE thought it would be a great idea to pair up Owen Hart and Koko B. Ware and dress them up in bright, baggy pants with checkered suspenders outside of just using them as jobbers to more established teams. The team would only make one pay-per-view appearance in a losing effort to The Headshrinkers at Survivor Series ’92 and would disband shortly after Hart suffered a knee injury. What is probably the worst part of looking back at this team is that Koko is a member of the WWE Hall of Fame while Owen is not.
14. Legion of Doom 2.0 (Animal & Heidenreich)
Now while the original iteration of the Road Warriors/Legion of Doom with Hawk and Animal is probably the best tag team in the history of pro wrestling, the later edition of the team where Hawk was replaced by the bland Heidenreich was anything but great. The chemistry between Hawk and Animal was nowhere present with Heidenreich, who seemed to be just a body filling a space as Animal was given a chance to dedicate his final run with the WWE to his fallen partner. Despite winning the Tag Titles once, the team did not last long as Heidenreich would be released in 2006 while Animal would last with the company only a few months longer.
13. Cactus Jack and Chainsaw Charlie
While Mick Foley and Terry Funk were legendary singles competitors and a cohesive team, the pairing of Cactus Jack and Chainsaw Charlie was a match made in hell. With Cactus Jack as an established character, many thought that Funk would just pair with him in their feud with the New Age Outlaws, yet Funk felt differently as he came to the ring in a red shirt, jeans, and suspenders, while wearing a nylon stocking over his face and carrying a chainsaw, loosely aping Leatherface. The duo would only have a few matches before breaking up and Funk would retire for the 50th time.
While the trio of Juventud Guerrera, Super Crazy, and Psicosis were all very talented Cruiserweights who worked well in tag team situations, their gimmick as the Mexicools killed any kind of credibility that they had as a team. Based on the idea that they wanted to battle the negative stereotypes placed upon Latino wrestlers, how would you think that they would combat that issue? If you guessed that they would dress like gardeners and ride into the ring on a riding “Juan Deere” lawnmower then you win the award for figuring out that pro wrestling writers love stupid irony. The team would last for a year before splitting up, after challenging for the WWE Tag Titles on a few occasions.
11. The Godwinns
After finding success in the 80s with Hillbilly Jim, the WWE decided to go back to the well and create a team of Arkansas pig farmers named the Godwinns. Managed by Hillbilly Jim, Henry O. Godwinn and Phineas I. Godwinn (get it, HOG and PIG), would battle various teams including the Bodydonnas and Smokin’ Gunns and would actually hold the WWE Tag Titles on two occasions. They would also hold the dubious title of Worst Tag Team two years in a row according to the Wrestling Observer Newsletter.
10. The Dicks
Using a similar gimmick popularized by the Fabulous Ones of being a “pretty boy” tag team, Chad and James Dick would debut as the Dicks, a pair of Chippendale-esque dancers. With the subtlety of a raging rhino, the Dicks were around solely for being a cheap double entendre. Using lotion rather than salt to blind opponents, the Dicks would get victories over the Animal/Heidenreich version of the Legion of Doom and the Mexicools, but would be released five months after their debut, losing to the Boogeyman in a handicap match.
9. David Flair & Crowbar
Despite being the son of one of the greatest pro wrestlers of all time, David Flair was never able to find much of his own success in the wrestling world. He would eventually team up with Crowbar and Daffney where they would have the shared gimmick of being mentally unstable, much to the chagrin’ of the audience. It was only made worse as they were entered into a tournament to win the vacant WCW Tag Team Titles and despite being the worst team in the tournament, would beat three teams including Kevin Nash and Scott Steiner to win the belts, though they would lose them two weeks later to The Mamalukes, breaking up shortly after.
8. Harlem Heat 2000
After a long run as one of the best tag teams in WCW, brothers Booker T and Stevie Ray would separate after Ray lost a match to team valet, Midnight. Ray would soon form a team with Big T, formerly known as Ahmed Johnson in the WWE, and would attempt to capture the same success that he had with his brother. Unfortunately it was very apparent that Booker T was the backbone of the original team and fans let Ray and Big T know as the team would flounder in the remaining year of WCW’s run as a promotion.
7. The Spirit Squad
If I held up a picture of a high school or college football game and told you to pick the one person who you thought was toughest person in the picture who would you choose? If you chose the players on the team, the coach on the sidelines, or the angry drunk dad in the stands you would be incorrect as according to the WWE it was obviously the male cheerleaders, because why else would they have created the Spirit Squad? The team would win the Tag Titles under the Freebird Rule and had a good finisher, but fans could not take them seriously with their gimmick and they were sent back to OVW, though member Nicky would find later success as Dolph Ziggler, so at least some good did come out of that horrible gimmick.
6. The Basham Brothers
For some reason pro wrestling writers love showcasing odd kinks in gimmicks, even though they almost never work. One such gimmick belonged to the Basham Brothers who came to the ring with their dominatrix/girlfriend Shaniqua, a former Tough Enough winner. Their whole gimmick was based around winning in order to make their mistress happy, and would win the Tag Titles on two occasions, but once Shaniqua had been released, the duo would bounce around the mid-card before ultimately being repackaged as Paul Heyman’s security team before being released in 2007.
5. Deuce ‘n Domino
A common complaint against Vince McMahon is how out of touch he is when it comes to pop culture and what is popular with society today. Now while there are examples for and against this idea, the team of Deuce ‘n Domino definitely lends credence to him being out of touch as this team was out of style decades before their debut. Styled as Fonzie-esque greasers, they would come to the ring in a 50s era car with their valet, Cherry who wore poodle skirts and roller skates to the ring. Worse was that the duo could have a decent match and were able to win the Tag Titles once but their gimmick just weighed them down by being so cartoony and out of sync with what wrestling fans were expecting of wrestlers in 2007.
4. Tekno Team 2000
Conan O’Brien used to have a bit on his showed called “In the Year 2000” where he would state premonitions about what the world would be like in the year 2000 based on things happening in the world at that time, and would continue to do so even after the year 2000. Unfortunately, the WWE decided to dip their feet into guessing the future with the horrible Tekno Team 2000 which featured Chad Fortune and Erik Watts as two guys meant to bring the WWE into the new millennium. Unfortunately they debuted five years before the new millennium with the idea that in that amount of time we would all start wearing silver jumpsuits and glittery face paint. It also did not help that neither Fortune or Watts could wrestle to save their lives, so the team was soon sent back to the time from which they came as they were released in 1996.
3. Anything That the Harris Twins Did
Talk about ringing all that you can out of a gimmick. The only thing that the Harris Brothers had going for them was that they were identical twins who were willing to incorporate that into their gimmicks. From working as the Disciples of Apocalypse to Creative Control to the Bruise Brothers, these two sucked their way through numerous promotions on the simple fact that they could do the heel trick of switching who was in the ring while the ref’s back was turned allowing for them to pick up the win, outside of that they did not really have that “it factor” to make their matches or gimmicks great.
2. West Hollywood Blondes
While pro wrestling has always had a subtext of homo-eroticism, most writers never made things completely overt unless to get strong heat from a crowd. Teams like the Fabulous Ones and Billy & Chuck worked in that they were either ambiguous in their relationship or seen as homoerotic in hindsight. In WCW that was not enough as they created the West Hollywood Blondes, consisting of Lenny Lane and Lodi who came to the ring covered in glitter, wearing pigtails, and licking blow pops. The duo succeeded in ticking everyone off from GLAAD and higher ups at Turner Broadcasting, which would force the team to be repackaged as Standards and Practices, a rib towards Turner Brass, which was also unsuccessful.
1. The Johnsons
Now while the West Hollywood Blondes may have been overt in coming off as gay men, they still do not hold a candle to The Johnsons, a wrestling pair of dongs. Debuting on the first pay-per-view broadcast of TNA and going under the name of Dick and Rod Johnson, they came to the ring covered in beige latex body suits meant to make them look like penises. No reason was ever given as to why anyone thought this was a good idea let alone one that would draw in fans and convince them to continue to buy tickets and merchandise, outside of being able to say that TNA was the first promotion to have wrestling phalluses under contract.
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