What's going on in America? There's orange in the White House and Eagle green all over the NFC East. What's happening here? The Dallas Cowboys are still "America's Team," right? Right?!
Did the manboy in charge do something to change this perception? What would America be without its Cowboys? Who will play the heroes in February? Those damn Patriots, again? No. We've have enough of them.
Tom Brady may be able to hunt down an innocent Falcon, but he is no match for a gun-slinging Cowboy. They're a little short on ammo right now, but wait until the reload of Ezekiel Elliott occurs. Then, the Cowboys go a-blazin.'
Of course, every Cowboys has a past. As they roam from town-to-town, they will often find themselves in some sticky situations. Today, we wrangle up some memories as we take a ride down Cowboy Memory Lane.
These are 15 Embarrassing Pictures The Dallas Cowboys Wish Didn't Exist:
15 Jerry Jones' Busy Hands
Where else would we begin but at the top of the franchise? Dallas Cowboys owner, Jerry Jones, is no stranger to controversy. Over the years, Jones has seen his name make headlines more often than he would care to remember.
Luckily for Jones, those senile years are creeping around the corner and he will likely forget all past indiscretions soon enough. One of which, includes Jones photographed with strippers, while being a "happily" married man.
The photos, which were released in 2014 were taken (according to Jones, who refused to comment for a while but was eventually backed into a corner) five years prior. Following this statement, Jones would avoid commenting further on the situation.
In the above photo, you can see Jones getting handsy with one of the women in what one must believe was not a first time occurrence.
14 Dak Prescott's Beat Down
The new face of the Dallas Cowboys almost had his mug rearranged while on Spring Break back in 2015. Dak Prescott, along with two teammates (Torrey Dale and Damian Williams) from Mississippi State were attacked during a Waka Flocka concert.
Prescott did not suffer any serious injuries and was back on campus shortly thereafter. However, the accused assailants would actually take to Twitter to brag about what they perceived as some soft of accomplishment.
Ultimately, Prescott, Dale, and Williams would not press charges against the braggadocios, faux alpha males and moved past the assault they endured in Panama City; proving to be the bigger men in the process.
Prescott, now looking to establish himself an elite NFL quarterback, has since taken much harder hits from much bigger men.
13 Tony Romo's Loose Nights
If you were a fan of the Dallas Cowboys during the Tony Romo years, then you likely had a love-hate relationship with a man who never knew your name. One week, Romo was everything you wanted, and the next, you were ready to say goodbye.
There is no denying what Romo brought to the team: #9 was clutch when needed. However, Romo struggled when it came to winning the big one. Romo was consistently driving towards the horizon, but unfortunately, the car always broke down.
There are some fans who will always remember Romo as the blonde-chasing goofball with a bad back and a knack for choking. And, it can be argued that they are justified to reminisce on Romo as such.
Just take a look at Romo in the above photo: out on the town with then girlfriend, Jessica Simpson, and looking ever-so goofy.
12 Ezekiel Elliott's Frat Boy Ways
Ezekiel Elliott doesn't have the best track record when it comes to women. The star running back's suspension/postponed suspension/suspension drama was the hottest topic in Cowboy Country over the past few months.
In the end, Elliott was in fact handed a suspension due to domestic violence charges. Which has only added to the already shady and sleazy behavior of NFL players as it pertains to women.
These young male athletes are often coddled and taught more about the values of success over the consequences of their actions. With Elliott, we often find a man who has yet to escape that frat boy mentality.
Such is the case with the above photo where Elliott exposes a woman's chest at a St. Patrick's Day party he attended in Dallas.
11 Michael Irvin's Prostate Exam
What does every Cowboy fan want to see from franchise greats? A series of selfies from their annual physical examination, of course. No? Well, somebody should have filled Michael Irvin in on this.
During a check-up, Irvin decided it was necessary to tweet out a series of photos from the doctor's office as a way to, let's say, educate? One photo even showed Irvin happily displaying and pointing at a cup of his own urine.
And then came the prostate exam picture. The former Dallas Cowboys wide receiver is shown in his underwear, bending over a table, and looking none too pleased about the impending procedure.
Irvin captioned the photo: "Dr told to drop them and bend this table. This is why I hate this every year. They got to come up w something better"
10 Halftime Dance
The 2010 Dallas Cowboys were supposed to play in Super Bowl XLV. Especially since the game was being held at Cowboys Stadium. However, they finished the season with a 6-10 record. This Cowboy squad struggled early on and never recovered.
With Wade Phillips "leading" this team to a 1-7 start, he was then replaced by offensive coordinator, and current head coach, Jason Garrett. Under the new leadership of Garrett, the Cowboys would finishing off their season at 5-3; displaying life for the future.
So, aside from Garrett taking over the reigns, what else can fans look back upon fondly from this season? Well, what about Halftime Lap Dance Girl? Yes, the infamous internet sensation who decided to give her boyfriend a lap dance during halftime.
Obviously, with Lap Dance Girl proving a huge highlight on the season, it can be argued that these images are an embarrassment to a team that was supposed to be so much better.
9 Jimmy Johnson's Enhancement Endorsement
At first glance, this is simply an old NFL coach trying to sell some product that does something that doesn't really help anybody. Hey, it's nothing new. Former coaches and players do it all the time.
However, upon further inspection, one will discover just where the embarrassment lies. Jimmy Johnson isn't trying to sell you an anti-fungal agent akin to John Madden's Tinactin commercials. Johnson, is selling you some "growth."
ExtenZe is a male enhancement supplement which has apparently helped the former Cowboys head coach out a great deal. And who are we to tell Jimmy's Johnson that he can't be happy?
Of course, this is a man who represented the great Dallas Cowboys franchise. And, isn't everything supposed to be "bigger in Texas?" Why would Johnson need this stuff?
8 Deion Sanders' Wieners
Oh, how many have tried to duplicate the success of The George Foreman Grill. Unfortunately, many have flopped in this venture. Even being "Primetime" Deion Sanders didn't work.
Sanders, a former Dallas Cowboys star, not only made waves in the NFL, but managed to cause a few rifts as an MLB player as well. However, Sanders couldn't quite translate what he learned about hot dogs at the ballpark into a successful business.
The Deion Sanders Hot Dog Express was, well, a hot dog machine. And, if you're some sort of junkie or insomniac, you may have even seen this infomercial playing on your television set during the wee hours of the morning.
If so, you must know that you are not alone, and you did not hallucinate one of the best football players from your youth trying to sell you hot dogs.
7 DeMarco Murray's Dirty Texts
While DeMarco Murray was busy establishing himself as a top-tier Dallas Cowboys running back (before selling out and leaving to play for the Philadelphia Eagles), he was apparently busy off the field as well; with another man's wife.
Brennan Clay - Murray's former teammate at the University of Oklahoma - would reveal this knowledge to the public. In fact, Clay would go as far as releasing text message conversations between Murray and his wife.
Now, as you can see in the above photo, Murray was certainly not a coy, little Cowboy. Cheating in sports is not uncommon. And, neither is cheating with a teammate's wife. However, it does classify one under the "dirtbag" category.
From Dallas, Murray would take his dirtbag ways to Philadelphia, where he struggled to perform. Currently, Murray is toughing out the dirt in Tennessee.
6 Terrell Owens' Modeling Days
Terrell Owens' time as a member of the Dallas Cowboys could be described as one big embarrassment. The popcorn celebration. The crying for Tony Romo. What was Owens doing in Dallas? Playing football or watching a romantic comedy?
Nevertheless, let's look at Owens' modeling. Yes, that's T.O strutting down the catwalk. And, in an industry dominated by ego, who else would fit more like a glove than Owens? The guy loves himself more than any Cowboys fan ever did.
You have to believe that the good, ol' boys from Texas who identify as fans of the franchise look at a photo like this and immediately spew up their morning grits while cussing out the former wide receiver.
The point to be made here is that Owens (who likely never realized it) has always been an embarrassment to himself both on and off the field.
5 Leon Lett's Thanksgiving Blunder
Thanksgiving 1993: the Dallas Cowboys lead the Miami Dolphins by a score of 14-13 with only fifteen seconds left on the clock. The Dolphins attempt a field goal to take the lead, but the kick is blocked. Game over, right? Wrong!
Enter Leon Lett; the big, bumbling Cowboy. Now, to Lett's credit, the field was covered in snow. However, Lett should have known that touching the football was unnecessary at this point, as the game was already over.
Instead, Lett attempted to pick up the football, and slipped. This would allow the Dolphins to recover and once again, take a shot at three points for the victory. And this time, the kick was good.
Since then, Lett's infamous botch has appeared on every blooper highlight reel around. It's a embarrassment of a play from a man wearing a Cowboys jersey.
4 Jessica Simpson "Fans"
Ah, the Tony Romo/Jessica Simpson relationship. Which Cowboy fan can forget that saga? Hell, some even blamed the pop star for Romo's poor play and the team taking losses. Yet, the romance continued to blossom.
At one point, Simpson was seen supporting Romo while wearing a pink Dallas Cowboys jersey during a game and the outrage/mockery ensued. Some fans even began to dress like Simpson, while wearing her jersey in rather unflattering ways.
The truth is: Simpson didn't contribute to Romo's problems on the field. There were times when Romo was just plain bad. It happens. Of course, fans can be petty and often look to shift the blame for sub-par seasons.
However, perhaps these fans should look at themselves as the problem. When the team is down, help them get back up, and stop stomping on their backs.
3 Troy Aikman's Commercial with Hulk Hogan
While Troy Aikman was starring alongside Hulk Hogan in Rent-a-Center commercials, there was no leaked video/audio of the former twelve-time World Champion's racial tirade. However, there is now.
Aikman was always perceived as one of the "good Cowboys" in a land full of miscreants and deviants. Meanwhile, Hogan was always known to be a jerk and crooked politician in the world of professional wrestling; which is not out of the ordinary.
But then came the racism. Suddenly, the childhood hero of millions was running wild at the mouth. And now, when we look back at Aikman sporting the signature Hogan moustache (which was obviously in good fun), it's difficult to not see embarrassment.
Aikman in his own right served as a childhood hero to many kids, so it makes sense if the former quarterback and the Dallas Cowboys wish this photo didn't exist.
2 Dez Bryant's Fight
There are a number of reasons to consider Dez Bryant an embarrassment to the Dallas Cowboys organization (that's another list for another day). However, let's pinpoint one particular moment.
Back at training camp in 2015, Bryant would find himself in an altercation with teammate, Tyler Patmon. There were fists thrown before Tony Romo stepped in to calm down Bryant and put an end to the situation.
After practice, the men hugged it out, however, what does this say about Bryant? A man who is supposed to be a franchise player? While Patmon was fighting for a roster spot, Bryant (weeks prior) was threatening to no-show training camp until he was paid.
This is a prime example of a pampered superstar feeling entitled to so much more from the franchise responsibly for the mansion in which he lives.
1 Cheerleader in Blackface
Whitney Isleib - a former Dallas Cowboys cheerleader - tops this list of embarrassing photos. Look at her above. Does this really require an explanation? Isleib went full on blackface for Halloween when dressing as Lil' Wayne.
Sure, we live in an ultra-sensitive world where the PC Police are quick to hand out fines on every, little thing they find "offensive." However, this is blackface. It was wrong in early film and it is definitely wrong in modern times.
If we're placing bets here, we can go ahead and wager the house on Isleib not becoming the first female President of the United States. But why? Who leaves their home like this and thinks anything good with come from their decision?
Was Isleib looking for a laugh? Was she looking to purposely be controversial to draw attention to herself? Whatever the case may be, this was in poor taste.