Paulina Gretzky is famous for being the greatest hockey player of all time. No wait, she’s famous for being the current No. 3 golfer in the world. Wait, that’s not right either.
Her fame is the result of a far greater, far more impressive accomplishment: being the hot daughter of the greatest hockey player of all time and the hot girlfriend of the third-ranked golfer in the world.
Paulina first caught the eye of the public a few years ago, when pictures (mostly of the bikini variety) started making the rounds online. Montreal Gazette dubbed her “hockey’s first daughter” in 2011, but soon she would be known more as the PGA’s hottest WAG. Dustin Johnson and Gretzky met in 2011, thanks to Paulina’s mother. She told Golf Digest of their meeting: "At the end of 2011, my mom played with Dustin in the Wednesday pro-am at Tiger’s tournament at Sherwood. She told Dustin about her daughter, blah-blah-blah, and invited him to the house that night.” And the rest, as they say, is history. We’re thankful that the two met, because otherwise Paulina might not have received as much exposure in the media.
Speaking of exposure, here are the top 15 hottest pictures from Paulina Gretzky’s Instagram.
15 The Classic Black Bikini
I’m not sure this even counts as a bikini. It looks more like small pieces of fabric held together by dental floss. When it comes to Paulina, less is more.
This picture’s captioned “Lounging,” and she tagged @juiceranch in it, just in case you couldn’t tell that it was product placement.
Ah, the life of an Instagram celebrity: sit around the pool wearing next to nothing while getting paid to drink juice. That’s not to say that Paulina lives a vapid lifestyle by any means. On the contrary. Last year she told Not Real Magazine that she devotes large portions of her time and salary giving back to the less fortunate, and when she’s not ladling out soup at the local homeless shelter, she’s cozying up with a nice book, like Thomas Pynchon’s Gravity’s Rainbow, which she called “the closest thing to literary sublimity since Tolstoy’s War and Peace.” Just kidding, she’s pretty much always sitting around in a bikini.
14 We're Under Arrest
This picture’s from a commercial she did with TaylorMade Golf. In the commercial, she plays a member of the “Speed Police.” That’s one police officer we wouldn’t mind being arrested by.
While not exactly an Academy Award-winning performance, this wasn’t Paulina’s first foray into acting. She has four credits to her name on IMDB: “Pink Girl” in In God We Trust, an early short film by Jason Reitman, who would go on to direct Juno and Up in the Air; “Gorgeous Blonde Senior” in Fame; “The Deputy” (hey, another officer role! Talk about typecasting) in Guns, Girls and Gambling; and “Bikini Girl Daisy” in the Razzie-winning Adam Sandler flick Grown Ups 2.
13 The Great White North Beauty
Even when fully decked out in winter wear, Paulina still manages to look hot. Her father was born in Brantford, Ontario, where the temperatures regularly drop well below freezing in the winter, so she should be more than comfortable in the snow.
Although an American citizen herself, having been born when Wayne was a member of the Los Angeles Kings, Paulina still has her roots in the Great White North…even if she denies it. In 2013, she peeved off a lot of Canadians when she proudly proclaimed herself to be American, and only American, telling Maxim, “I know where my dad is from, and I know how much he means to Canada, but I’m American.”
12 California Surfin'
It's possible that Paulina has absolutely no idea how to surf, but does that really matter? With her bleach blonde hair and her golden-brown skin, she's got the California surfer girl look down pat, and that's more important than actually being able to surf (in our books at least).
It's a miracle that she even finds time to work on her tan. Between lounging by the pool in a bikini and lounging by the beach in a bikini, there's hardly a spare second for her to lounge around a tanning salon.
Thank God Wayne was traded from the Oilers to the Kings just before having Paulina, otherwise she would have the frostbitten look of an Edmontonian (not that there's anything wrong with that) instead of the sun-kissed look of a Californian.
11 Lounging On A Ledge
Did we mention that Gretzky (that's Paulina, not Wayne) takes a lot of bikini pictures?
She gets a little creative with this one, perched on the edge of a cliff with her body facing away from the camera. Either she’s paying homage to Hans Zatzka’s famous “Reclining Woman,” or she’s trying to emphasize the (frustrating) shadow created by her bikini bottoms. Probably the latter, but given Gretzky’s predilection for late 19th century Austrian religious paintings, it’s not unreasonable to assume that it could be the former.
In a way, social media is today’s art. You’re more likely to find people browsing through Instagram pictures than wandering the halls of The Louvre. With that in mind, Paulina Gretzky is one of the greatest artists of the 21st century, right up their with Kim Kardashian and Jen Selter, whose butt selfies harken back to Botticelli’s “The Birth of Venus.”
10 Mysterious Beauty
Here’s Paulina in a sexy outfit, looking wistfully out the window. I like to think that she’s contemplating the implications of Trump’s promise to repeal Obamacare, or the recent developments in the Middle East, although it’s more likely that she’s thinking about what bikini she’s going to wear the next time she lounges out by the pool.
Fun fact: the window she’s looking out of isn’t actually attached to anything. Few know that Paulina is a part of a small yet tightly knit community of people known as “fenestrators” who like to collect window frames. It’s estimated that she has a collection of over 1,000 window frames scattered about her house.
9 Hit Me Baby One More Time
Paulina made every millennial guy’s dreams come true when she dressed up as Britney Spears from the “…Baby One More Time” music video. And dare we say she pulled off the schoolgirl look even better than the pop queen?
Gretzky, an aspiring pop singer herself, has stated that Spears is a major influence on her music career. Other influences? Frederic Chopin, Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky, Modest Mussorgsky, Nikolai Andreyevich Rimsky-Korsakov, and, of course, Taylor Swift (Paulina’s long held that, with the exception of “Clair de Lune,” Claude Debussy is woefully overrated). Also, traces of Philip Glass’s minimalist masterpiece Metamorphosis, with its subtle yet profound evocations of isolation and loneliness, can clearly be found on Gretzky’s hit single “Collecting Dust.”
8 Mrs. Dress Up
This post is captioned, “i❤playing dress up,” but judging by how little she actually wears, a more apt description might be something along the lines of, “i❤wearing as little clothes as possible, taking pictures of myself, and then posting it online for millions of people to see, not because I need validation or anything like that, but just because I feel confident in my skin and I want people to know it. It’s not that I want to show off or come across as vain; I just think it’s important to be happy with your body.”
Then again, that might be a little too longwinded. On second thought, “i❤playing dress up” is fine.
7 Leather, Studs, Chains, Oh My!
Paulina took a break from bikinis and skintight dresses to slip into something a little more comfortable: a leather skirt and bra, complete with metal studs and gold chains, undoubtedly inspired by her love for all things medieval, including her favorite 14th century poet Geoffrey Chaucer.
Who can forget Ms. Gretzky’s doctoral thesis on the influence of Geoffrey Chaucer on William Shakespeare’s Troilus and Cressida, which she presented at a conference at the University of Oxford wearing this very outfit. “Insightful yet accessible, with just the right amount of cleavage,” read Nigel Monarch of The Oxford Student.
6 The Good Wife
There’s nothing hotter than a woman who loves her man. Here she is showing her love for her man by carrying around his golf clubs. Problematic gender implications aside, it’s a very cute picture.
Paulina’s been known to hit the links herself. In 2014, she told Golf Digest that she first got into the sport through her father: “Oh, I've definitely played. I walked all 18 holes in my dad's tournament. Felt like the longest day of my life, but I stuck through it. The truth is, I was a total tomboy and loved sports. Dad always says I was his best athlete.” It’s interesting that Wayne would call Paulina his best athlete, considering his son Ty was a decent high school hockey player and his other son, Trevor, played professional baseball. It’s possible he was lying to her.
5 A Beautiful Sunrise
Like all ridiculously beautiful women, Paulina Gretzky only hangs out with other ridiculously beautiful women. Here she is on a balcony overlooking the pool at the El Dorado Golf and Beach Club in Cabo San Lucas with an unnamed beauty, wearing matching aviators and skimpy one-piece swimsuits that read “Tequila Sunrise.” I think it’s fair to assume that Gretzky got more use out of the “beach” side of the Golf and Beach Club.
This picture was followed by one of Paulina and her friends on a yacht. Comments on the picture ranged from “Paulina Gretzky is hot” to “Good God, Paulina Gretzky is super hot.”
4 Happy Valentine's day
Captioned with a Happy Valentine’s message, this picture was clearly meant for boyfriend Dustin Johnson, who is currently ranked the number 3 golfer in the world according to the Official World Golf Ranking. He's also ranked the number one luckiest guy in the world according to the Unofficial World Lucky Guys Ranking.
Johnson won his first major tournament last year at the US Open, and there to greet him at the 18th hole was Gretzky, wearing a tight, impossibly short dress that left little to the imagination. Focus quickly shifted from Johnson’s golf accomplishments to his private life accomplishments.
Dustin drew comparisons to Tiger Woods that day—not for his ability to play golf, but for his ability to nab beautiful blonde women.
Paulina is the queen of self-promotion. Here she is promoting a photo shoot that she did for Maxim. With over 3,000 likes and nearly 100 comments, I think it’s fair to say that this promotion was a success.
On top of Maxim, Ms. Gretzky has posed for Golf Digest and Flare. Her Golf Digest spread received a lot of negative backlash because the magazine opted to go with a scantily clad non-golfer in Gretzky over more deserving female pro golfers, like Lexi Thompson or current number one Lydia Ko. It’s kind of hard to argue with Golf Digest’s logic, however, as the controversy surrounding the issue gave the magazine more exposure than it had ever received.
What exactly does Paulina Gretzky do for a living? According to her Wikipedia page, she’s a musician, but we’ve never heard any of her music. Judging by her Instagram account, it seems like her job might be professional bikini wearer. Hey, you won’t hear any complaints from us.
Her father has a net worth of roughly $200 million, while her boyfriend is worth about 1/10th of that, so really there’s no need for her to work. That’s a good thing, because it means she has more time to work on her tan.
This picture was taken a little over a year ago. Considering she'd recently had a baby, we’d say her figure looks pretty amazing.
Believe it or not, this is an example of “casual” wear for Paulina. Whenever she finds a free second from her grueling, arduous life of sitting by the pool in a bikini, she likes to relax and unwind by changing into a comfortable pair of 10-inch high heels and lingerie with stockings—you know, like all women, right?
It’s rumored, although not confirmed, that the first daughter of hockey has actually never been fully clothed in her entire life. The closest she came was when she attended a funeral in 2012 and wore a miniskirt that only showed off part of her butt cheeks.
In all seriousness though, Paulina Gretzky is a beautiful woman, and we’re glad she’s happy to show off her amazing body. More power to her!