First, let's be painfully clear, and I do mean painfully, like extraordinarily painful, like toothpicks under fingernails and water boarding. The poster boy for the NHL, Sidney Crosby, is undeniably the best hockey player in the world (punch me) since he was drafted #1 overall by the Pittsburgh Penguins in 2005. In 12 seasons, he's won three Cups, scored over 100 points five times, and was on pace to score 100 points an additional 4 times if he wasn't injured (kick me twice). He's made the playoffs 11 times, and only not averaged a point per game 3 times (pour salt into my wounds). Last but not even close to being least, he's scored double the amount of goals at even strength than on the power play (get the guillotine ready).
Deep breath. I need to get over that. O.K, so here's my warning to everyone in Pittsburgh and Cole Harbor (a beautiful place with great beaches, small towns, people, and tasty food), no longer is this gonna be pretty. This is also the fun part, one hockey lovers chance to prove Sidney Crosby is a whiny, hypocritical punk that is an embarrassment to hockey, the NHL, and the integrity of the game. Now I feel better.
They say great players change the game, and he's definitely changed the game. With the help of Darcy Tucker, diving/unsportsmanlike conduct should be renamed. When Brad Watson skates to the sin bin he should say, "Toronto Maple Leaf Penalty, #43, 2 minutes for Sidney Crosbeeing."The NHL has gone from the "Gordie Howe Hat Trick" to the "Sidney Crosby Hat Trick," a goal, a dive, and a cheap shot. In fact, not only should the fines be tripled, but the player penalized for "Crosbeeing" should receive a 2 minute major. Ah, but that's a topic for another day. Though the Capitals, Rangers, and Flyers are the teams most involved with Crosby's petulant actions, no player or team is safe. For now, let's talk about 15 instances the NHL and Sidney Crosby don't want you to remember.
17 15. The Hissy Fit
On May 4, 2016, the Pens entered Game 4 with a 2-1 advantage against the Capitals. In the 3rd period, with the game tied at 2, Crosby circled below the Caps blue line to fore check the Washington defense. Ovechkin was back checking when he put a love-tap on Crosby's forearm, not the open space between the glove and elbow pad. Crosby waved his left arm like he took a wicked slash and was then stood up along the boards by Alzner. Sid was so outraged a slashing call wasn't made that he went berserk. He yapped, complained, and cried as he milked it for every second and left the ice. As he went down the the tunnel, he swung his stick against the walls two times and hurled it forward. He was SOOOO injured that he returned 4 minutes later and skated a regular shift the rest of the game and playoffs.
16 14. O'Reilly Crotch Shot
A "Sidney Crosby Hat Trick" occurred on the night of March 21, 2017, in Buffalo, during a 3-1 win vs. the Sabres. At the 15 minute mark of the 1st, with the puck in the Penguins zone, O'Reilly was cruising toward the net. He had beaten Crosby who then gave the forward a 2 handed uppercut with the stick straight up between the legs. O'Reilly went to the ice in pain as every man in America felt it. Of course the refs missed it, and Crosby, if he were any other player in the league, would have received a five minute major for spearing and probably a game misconduct.
But Sid got away with the cheap shot for the first third of his trick. Just before the end of the 1st, Crosby scored a sensational, one handed back hand GOAL. He completed his Hat Trick with a dive at 18:35 of the third. Evander Kane was beat by Crosby and while trying to lift Sid's stick, he clipped him in the face. He was a given a well deserved 4 minute penalty, Sid lost some teeth, but the DIVE was Oscar worthy. He threw his hands and gloves in the air, hurled himself backward, forward, fell to his knees, rolled on his back, and held his face until he was airlifted to the nearest nurse's office.
15 13. Intoxicated?
Now look, everybody is entitled to go out on the town and have a good time every once in a while. To make sure Crosby didn't succumb to the temptations that come with being a young superstar, Crosby lived with his boss (and one-time teammate) Mario Lemieux for several years early in his career.
Here is Crosby out for a night on the town and while he's well within his right to have a good time, it definitely is an image the NHL wishes wasn't out there online. Crosby is leaning over and definitely cannot be 100% sober here. We hope his friends got him home okay that night, as he sure looked to be in no condition to drive himself home here.
14 12. Marc Methot's Finger
On Thursday night, March 3, 2017, Ottawa defenceman Marc Methot was lugging the puck across the Penguins' blue line. Crosby was a step behind, at an angle, and carelessly chopped down on Methot's glove. Methot knew something was wrong and skated after Crosby. Crosby, almost in an attempt to seem innocent, ignored him and glided away. He had an unconcerned, distracted expression as he skated and Methot finally gave up the chase to check out the damage.
He took off his glove and held up his finger which was nearly ripped off. It was ugly, as the tip of his finger was nearly severed in half. And yep, you guessed it. Crosby wasn't penalized. We're already starting to see a pattern here as to why so many people dislike Crosby.
13 11. The Jock Strap
What we have here is a possible explanation into his on ice behavior. Do you see that thing hanging over his right shoulder? Well that's Crosby's jock strap. Now I am about the furthest person in the world anyone could consider a germaphobe, but look at that. I fully support superstitions and wore the same bandana under my mask for 10 years. But that is a jock strap that goes over a very important area of the body. Now it's almost impossible to clean hockey equipment to the distaste of many, and most equipment is aired out on a driveway or front yard. Players will also wear out and tape up any piece of equipment they can and refuse to replace anything. But when you're a millionaire and married, there is no excuse. According to my latest research, Sid is married but doesn't have children. Surprised?
12 10. Dominic Moore
Sidney Crosby and the Pens got what was coming to them in the 2014 playoffs vs the New York Rangers. In game 6 of the Eastern Conference Semifinals, with the Rangers leading 3-1, at home but trailing the series 3-2, Crosby started another "broo ha ha" at the end of the 2nd. He got tangled up with Moore behind the Rangers net and speared him right between the legs.
Moore tried to go after him but Crosby wouldn't turn around to face him. After Sid's teammates come to his rescue and the referees stand between Sid and the vengeful Rangers, Crosby's lips jawed away and he didn't even get a penalty. How did he avoid a major? I don't know but he should try robbing banks. The Rangers would get revenge, as goalie Henrik Lunqvist would skate by and squirt his water bottle on Sid. He'd also play a magnificent game 7 to beat Pittsburgh and Crosby on their own ice.
11 9. Creepy Crosby
Once again, we have an image of Crosby possibly intoxicated and seemingly at a house party this time. That's not really the issue here though, more than it is the fact that Crosby looks creepy as hell photo bombing these two young women trying to take a picture. To be fair, no one knows what Crosby's relationship with those two girls was like, but this certainly isn't one of Crosby's best looks. He looks creepy and is bordering on d-bag territory in this snap. We sure hope he was close friends with those two ladies, otherwise this just looks really weird. This is something you'd expect some creeper in a club do, but not the face of the NHL. Right?
10 8. Hitting Boris Valábik While He's Down
Let's get in the time machine and go back to 2008 versus the Atlanta Thrashers (what a mistake that was). Crosby further embarrassed himself and the league and this one is rarely mentioned. At the end of the first period, in front of the Penguins' net, a melee erupts. Brooks Orpik is going at it and Kris Letang takes that unbelievably tough Boris Valábik to the ice. Crosby then jumps in and lands two punches to the back of the head of the down player, one to the ribs, and then a left uppercut, from behind, right into the jock.
It's almost unbelievable. But what is even more outrageous is Valábik and Crosby both received minors for roughing. Crosby jumped a player already being held down, delivered head, rib, and below the belt punches, and the refs turned the other way. Sidney would go on to score 2 more points and the Pens won 6-3.
9 7. Vanity Crosby
Sidney posed in the December 6th issue in 2010 of... "Vanity Fair." I don't know about you, but things are getting a little more clear. First, his interview was a bore. When asked about his moves on a breakaway, or if he likes a slapper or to deke, he said just cares about if the puck crosses the line. Interview answer 101. When asked about fights, he wasn't too worried about them and said he's gotten used to it. Is that why he sucker punches opponents and waits for the referees to get in the middle? But for his sake, with those pipes, he's better off avoiding any kind of trouble. In any event, it sure makes for an awkward featured picture.
8 6. The Mumps
Admittedly there's nothing Crosby could be blamed for here, as the NHL was suffering a widespread mumps outbreak in the 2015-16 season. The reason for the inclusion is that it's rather embarrassing for the NHL that they let the virus spread throughout the league (reportedly it began in Anaheim) and made its way to the face of the league. This was just a look that of Crosby that the NHL would want forgotten altogether. Crosby is the NHL's poster child and it was pretty embarrassing for the league that showed it couldn't protect its stars. Fortunately for Gary Bettman, Crosby and company recovered and old Gary got to hand the Stanley Cup to his favorite player later that season. Whoopty doo Gary.
7 5. Diving Against Derian Hatcher
In many ways, this was the beginning of the Flyer v. Crosby war that continues today with Claude Giroux. In Philadelphia, in 2005, Crosby's rookie year, he skated into the Flyers zone, one on one with big #2, Derian Hatcher. Crosby tried to pinch between Hatcher and the boards. Derian lined him up and smashed him against the board, a clean hockey hit, but Crosby whipped his head back and dropped to the ice. The puck was picked up by a Flyer and as they head up ice, Crosby was holding onto Hatcher's stick, and looking at the ref to see if they were watching. Then, Crosby started rolling on the ice, looking for a call, his eyes wide open. He didn't get it this time, he lost two teeth on the play, and from that moment on, he was and still is enemy #1.
6 4. Concussion Troubles
In this case, this is more on the NHL, as the league has repeatedly neglected to protect its star players. Whether you love or hate Crosby, the NHL has failed on many levels to address hits to the head correctly. In this year's playoffs, Crosby once again suffered a concussion, this time in Game 3 of the second round against the Washington Capitals. In all other sports leagues, they've managed to protect star players, but the NHL has repeatedly failed in making sure their star players stay healthy. Here was another case of Crosby getting concussed and you wonder if the hits to the head will eventually shorten his career. Isn't it weird this latest concussion was also suffered against Washington, much like the first documented one at the outdoor classic six years ago?
5 3. The Linesman
On April 1, 2014, Sidney Crosby took a dive when he was accidentally hit in the visor by a linesman. The linesman was standing on the blue line and waved the "Safe Sign" to signal the play into the Hurricanes' zone was onside. Crosby was entering the zone when the linesman struck him. Immediately, Sidney tossed his head backwards, flailed his arms, and crashed to his knees. For all we know, he probably thought a player grazed him and went into old habits. He seemed to realize what really happened and popped back up to join the play. The Hurricanes won 4-1 in Pittsburgh, and you can bet the replay wasn't shown on the big screen, and this is no April Fools' Day Joke. Shameful.
2 2. Sid The Awkward Kid
This is not Adam Sandler, Jason Biggs, or Andy Samberg. He did not get a Bar-mitzvah. This is Sidney Crosby in the 9th grade from his yearbook at Astral Drive Junior High School. We've all been there, and when I was there, it was just as UGLY. So I feel for him, and maybe this is where it all began. In 9th grade, on Freshman day, some Seniors tried to flush me down the toilet but I fought my out of it. They ended up becoming my friends and I wore it as a badge of courage. After seeing this picture, I empathize with Sid, wonder what horror stories he must have encountered, and if the trickle down effect has lead to what we see today.
1 1. Giving P.K Subban "The Business"
In this years Cup Finals during the critical Game 5 with the series tied, in the first period, Crosby should have received a 5 minute major and game misconduct. After Crosby tried to make a "Hockey Play" and deliver a clean, hard hit to Subban behind the net, they tumbled to the ice. That's when the "Hockey Play" ended and the penalties should have begun. Crosby, who has suffered numerous concussions, landed on top of P.K and pinned Subban's leg to the ice. An official was watching the play up ice and the two players, and it's clear Crosby is watching the official's eyes.
When the official was distracted, he repeatedly slammed P.K's neck and head on the ice. It's obviously an intent to injure, cowardly, and callous series of blows. Now Subban is no saint, but this was brutal and ugly. And the refs? Both players were given minors, and the Pens went on to win the game and the series.
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