CaZXL, the wrestler formerly known as Big Cass, has opened up on his issues with anxiety and depression, having struggled with his mental health.
The ex-WWE star, who had grown in confidence after having realized his dream of becoming a professional wrestler and making it to the biggest promotion in the world, admits that he was never able to let go of feelings of insecurity and anxiety despite his success.
He would resort to alcohol instead of seeking help from therapy or taking anti-depressants. And his addiction was so bad that, at times, he wished he could just go to sleep and never wake up. Now, though, he's just happy to still be alive after recalling how poorly he ate, how seldom he worked out and how many cigarettes he went through every day.
“If anybody out there suffers with depression or anxiety and you’re hiding it because there’s a stigma out there that you’re weak, you’re not weak,” he said in a video featuring on Diamond Dallas Page's Youtube channel.
“Whatever it is, you need to go seek help. Whether it’s medication or talk therapy or whatever it is that you need, you need to get it, because hiding it deep down isn’t going to work. That’s what I did for a long time and eventually, ‘Pop!’ It’s just an explosion. Whatever you need to do fix it, make sure you do that, because keeping that sh*t bottled up deep down, it ain’t worth it. From someone that lived it, seek help.”
CaZXL, whose real name is William Morrissey, does not hold a grudge against WWE for dropping him.
“They had every right to get rid of me,” said during the video, in which he revealed that his "moment of clarity" came about after he suffered a seizure at a House of Hardcore event in December.
The wrestler claims that he viewed the incident as a sign that he should turn his life around, having been informed at the emergency room that the seizure could have killed him.