Some great stuff happened this week in WWE and some questionable stuff also happened. Isn’t that always the case? The red brand hosted Fastlane this past Sunday, yet RAW the next night was ten times better. Go figure. The card for WrestleMania is filling up fast, and as of now, there’s seven confirmed matches and like 10 more rumored matches. How are they going to make time for all this madness? Well, I suppose there’s that 3 hour pre-show plus the 5 hour event itself. I may or may not be dramatizing, it could actually be 8 hours.
Here are the five best and five worst moments this week in WWE.
5. WORST – Predictable Universal Championship Victory
Oh, what do you know? Another 30 second main event match featuring the returning Goldberg. How does WWE spend half a year building Kevin Owens up to be the brand’s top guy only to have Goldberg destroy him with two moves? Did Goldberg not have it in him to go at least another 30 seconds? I don’t get it and I don’t like it.
5. BEST – “You were never my best friend.”
How dare Kevin Owens? It’s one thing to stab your best friend in the back, but then to tell Chris Jericho that he was “never [his] best friend”? Ouch. Kevin. Your awful behaviour is precisely why Jericho’s music distracted you into losing your Universal title.
Chris Jericho is full-on good guy now. We all loved him even when he was heel so it makes sense. There’s no question these two will have one of if not the best match come WrestleMania when they battle for Chris Jericho’s United States Championship.
4. WORST – Lana’s Boots
What? We’re doing the best and worst dressed in WWE? Nah. But these boots worn by the Ravishing Lana at Fastlane are too horrible not to mention. Lana normally has great style, but what the heck are those things? I know WWE and The Jetsons recently paired up, but that shouldn’t give Lana the right to rummage through Judy Jetson’s closet.
4. BEST – SmackDown Live Main Event
In the main event of SmackDown, Randy Orton and AJ Styles battled for the first time to determine who would go on to face Bray Wyatt at WrestleMania. If you didn’t already know this, AJ Styles produces gold pretty much anytime he’s in the ring. Add the Viper to the mix, and we get some quality wrestling. In the end, RKO OUT OF NOWHERE allowed Orton to score the victory and re-earn his WWE Championship opportunity.
3. WORST – Super Cena No More
After a painfully average mixed tag team match which saw John Cena and Nikki Bella pair up for the first time, The Miz would drag Cena out of the ring and toss him shoulder-first into the steal stairs. This somehow knocked Cena cold, allowing for Miz to talk trash for upwards to five minutes. Is this all it takes now to knock Cena cold?
3. BEST – Roman Reigns vs. Braun Strowman
As much as Roman Reigns is the worst because WWE does the absolute worst with him, he can still work some pretty great matches – such with the match of the night at Fastlane when he took on Braun Strowman… and won. If you’ve read any of these weekly features before, you know I’m not Roman’s biggest fan but I’m cool with the victory here. Braun’s been RAAAWRing his way through RAW acting as if his poop don’t stink and it’s about time he swallowed a loss. However, Strowman is still much more badass than Reigns and he’s exceeded everyone’s expectations of what a big guy can do in the WWE.
2. WORST – The New Day
People are still cheering these guys and it surprises me. To be honest though, I’d probably cheer them too because they’re highly cheerable but is anyone else getting sick of them? All they do now is hump ice cream. And they’re the hosts of WrestleMania? That means we’re going to have to watch them hump ice cream throughout the entirety of the show? Is anyone actually excited for this?
2. BEST – The Undertaker Chokeslams Roman Reigns
“With all due respect, this is my yard now” said Roman Reigns to The Undertaker. What part of that is respectful, Roman? Thankfully, Undertaker responded by chokeslamming him, all while the crowd chanted “ROMAN SUCKS”. Ha! Take that, Roman!
The rumors turned out to be true (do they ever not turn out to be true?) and Roman Reigns will wrestle The Undertaker at WrestleMania 33. Are you excited? Not really? Well it’s happening anyway.
1. WORST – Bayley’s A Heel Now, Right?
At Fastlane, Bayley asked Charlotte not to bring Dana Brooke to the ring so the two could face each other one-on-one to see who really is more deserving of that RAW Women’s title. So funny then, that Charlotte actually complies only for Sasha Banks to interfere anyway and cost Charlotte the match. The Bayley I know, would’ve shoved Sasha and been all like “WTF, Sasha!?” But, nah. The Bayley we now know chose to celebrate with Sasha instead.
What the hell happened to Bayley? Her character used to stand up for what’s right. I think it’s WWE’s grand plan to turn Sasha heel, but they’re damaging Bayley in the process. When Charlotte looks like a better woman, we have a problem.
1. BEST – The Cruiserweight Division
This week, WWE seemed to actually want to fix things up with the Cruiserweight division by giving them more than the usual five minutes to tell a story. Not a surprise then, they succeeded admirably. Both Cruiserweight Championship matches wound up stealing their respective show. At Fastlane, Neville defended his belt against Jack Gallagher and defended it again the next night on RAW against former Champ Rich Swann.
And how ’bout that Austin Aries? He’s got himself so over with the WWE Universe, it would be surprising if he and Neville don’t face off at WrestleMania. Hopefully, they don’t get the pre-show treatment because they’re more than deserving for a real spot on the card.
Until next week!
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