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Top 10 Times It SUCKED To Be Sting

Poor poor Sting. Like The Undertaker, he is one of the few superstars that chose not to defect for better pay or situation. Through the good and bad (and there was a LOT of bad), the Stinger stood by

Poor poor Sting. Like The Undertaker, he is one of the few superstars that chose not to defect for better pay or situation. Through the good and bad (and there was a LOT of bad), the Stinger stood by his promotion. From the NWA to the New Blood, from Flair to Vampiro, he gave a consistent effort no matter how ridiculous the situation. We're talking having to introduce 'none other than, the SHOCKMASTER' ridiculous.

Think about it, his first tag partner was The Ultimate Warrior. Warrior was mediocre in the ring during his prime; imagine him back then! From there he did benefit from working with some of the very best. Getting to learn from Flair, Steamboat, and Vader must have had a fantastic influence. But he also had a zillion matches with Lex Luger and Sid Vicious; not fun.

WCW could never master the production values of the WWE, even though they had the resources of billionaire Ted. Turner's production company rarely hired anyone with actual wrestling experience. The cameras would miss moves and struggle to identify the action. This also resulted in some embarrassingly cheesy vignettes and actual movies that will live forever.

Honorable mention for this list definitely has to be the Beach Blast movie. Stinger and co. get out-acted by two little girls and for some reason him and the Bulldog emerge from the water with their hands in the air like they just won the tag titles! Yet they don't smile. They just hold their hands in the air, half-submerged, and stare emotionlessly at the camera waiting for someone to yell 'cut'.

Another dishonorable moment has to be his long-awaited WrestleMania 'moment'. The buildup and match were great but the finish made Sting look like a chump. He shakes the hand of a guy who disrespected his career and hit him with a sledgehammer? Thanks for giving Triple H HIS WrestleMania moment, Sting.

But that's how it goes, sometimes it just SUCKS to be Sting.

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10 Shortest WCW Championship Reign

With all of his years of loyal service you'd think he would leave WCW with quite the legacy right? Well, a part of that legacy is the shortest WCW title reign in history. Of course Jericho held it for just 18 minutes before unifying the two World Titles, but that's quite different of course.

This was Nitro at its craziest. Sting won the belt earlier in the night to a gigantic crowd reaction only to lose it to DDP later on in a four-way dance also featuring a fresh Nash and Goldberg. To put this show in perspective, Flair is in a mental institution and one of the Nasty Boys is wrestling. This show was a beautiful car crash.

Late WCW is like the Rocky Horror Picture Show. If you treat it as the B-wrestling crap it is, you can have a lot of fun

9 Robocop

Man, WCW sure had some talent. This segment featured Gordon Solie backstage, Jim Ross on commentary, and fantastic announcer Gary Capetta at his finest. This broadcast dream team sold the hell out of Robocop and for three minutes, and I truly believed in him.

This moment is frequently referenced as yet another embarrassing WCW idea, but at the time the crowd was losing their minds for it. Robocop got a serious pop when he ripped that door off.

At least they didn't go full Zeus and force us to watch a tag match.

8 Human Torch match

WCW 2000 was a mess, but they still had the legendary Stinger on their roster. They already had the immortal Jeff Jarrett as a champion, so they stuck him in a feud with a wannabe who also used face paint.

A feud with Vampiro means you are definitely getting hit in the head with a tombstone (not the piledriver) in a graveyard. One of Sting's defining characteristics is that he will meet villains in the strangest places and never suspect a trap. Blood would be poured and fires would be lit. But it was the Human Torch match that sucked the hardest.

A boring few minutes in the ring set up the long climb to the top of the rigging so an obvious stuntman could be lit on fire and plunge perfectly onto a landing pad. WCW didn't even think to hide it below the crowd's vision. But that wasn't even the worst part.

The worst part was how WCW sold it as a real death. With the announcers yelling to get the camera off of Vampiro, and imitating the moments after Owen Hart's tragedy. It was an embarrassment for all and yet again Sting was at the center of it.

7 Rick Steiner's Dog-faced dogs

via wwe.com

Sting versus Rick Steiner with zero gimmick is a guaranteed watchable match. They were both talented in the ring, well acquainted with each other, and seemed to possess very little ego when it came to winning or losing. This could have been a highlight of the wretched Great American Bash '99 but of course that couldn't happen. SEVEN matches ended with interference that night and this would be no exception.

They made their way backstage (never entertaining) when the first sign of trouble appeared: Tank Abbott. A couple sloppy cuts later and Sting is now holding a towel and a dog is attached to it. There's a second dog biting a pad on his boot as well. This looked as bad as the early 90s vignettes WCW used to produce.

If you're watching this on the Network, the match marker actually says “Match ends in DQ when Sting is attacked by dogs". I'd love to imagine this on a giant whiteboard in their booking room but it's fairly obvious they didn't write anything down.

6 The Black Scorpion

Perhaps the precursor to Crow-Sting; The Black Scorpion was a special opponent brought in for the Venice Beach hero.

He had magical powers of course. He could project his voice in the arena (Ole Anderson's voice actually) and mind-control fans into attacking their beloved Stinger.

Sting had to go on with his charade until it mercifully ended in a mediocre cage match. Flair was revealed as the masked man and the magic powers were never explained.

Somehow I think an explanation would have made it worse.

5 Coal Miner's Glove?

via wwe.com

In all that time they spent hyping up this match, you'd think they would explain what the heck it is. Instead they went ahead like this was common knowledge.

This also involved yet another WCW-joint, this time in a Mos Eisley type bar. Jake Roberts was the baddie this time around and he was actually a very competent actor (it's also very easy to imagine the real Jake Roberts hanging out in a bar like that).

In the end the glove had nothing to do with the finish. Like a great babyface, Sting hit Roberts from behind with the glove and got the pin as Roberts was bitten by his own snake.

As usual, Ross sells the hell out of it.

4 Jeff Hardy

I love that the storyline is how Hardy needed time to 'prepare' for this match. Well, his preparation methods don't seem quite effective (or legal) as he was clearly in no state to perform. Sting and Bischoff miraculously saved this train wreck before it went completely off the rails.

After painfully watching Hardy tease the crowd with his delayed shirt toss, Stinger quickly delivered his Death Drop and pin that were as close to a shoot as you'll ever see.

He gave Hardy the disappointed dad look, and hung around the ring most likely to protect the ref from a potential violent temper tantrum. Seems like the ref appreciated it as he left the ring with Sting.

Sting could only look at the pissed off fans and say "I agree."

3 Starrcade '97

Like an Olympic gymnast finishing off a near-perfect routine with a loud fart, WCW followed up their brilliant build with some stinky booking.

It was one of the few times they showed patience, keeping Sting off TV long enough to elicit a ginormous pop when he returned to clean the ring of the New World Order.

WCW was peaking creatively and with Bret Hart's debut thrown in, it could have been a legendary event that prevented or held off their demise. But instead it flopped and Sting was made to look like a chump. The match is remembered as sourly as Hogan/Warrior II (notice the trend) and WCW started their spiral downwards.

After Hart restarted the match, Sting got the win (unsanctioned by WCW?), and the title was promptly vacated the next night.

2 None other than.....The Shockmaster

WCW is like playing hide and seek with a child. They pick a terrible hiding spot, and you have to pretend you don't see them in order to keep the game going.

Did they not think a storm trooper helmet would be recognizable? Star Wars was the HIGHEST GROSSING FILM of all time. That kindergarten craft-job they did to it wasn't fooling anyone.

Almost as bad as Ottman falling is how the Bulldog, Harlem Heat, and WCW's production staff handled the situation. Could they not turn the mics off while these dummies gave a curse-filled commentary?

Would you ever imagine Sid Vicious being the most professional? He sold the Shockmaster like it was Darth Vader and quickly distracted everyone with some great yelling.

And of course Sting was the man to introduce this nightmare.

You know, Sting doesn't really have any catch phrases, and he stole his WHOO from Flair and the chest beating from Warrior.

So that means his most memorable line is "none other than........THE SHOCKMASTER"

1 White Castle of Crap

There were so many bad WCW mini movies that I almost forgot about this one.

Sting is sent an invitation on a scroll written by Harry Potter. It's an invitation for a pre-SuperBrawl party! (that tradition ever get started?). Although it has Vader's symbol, it takes place at a Castle of FEAR and is sent on a goddamn scroll, he decides to go anyway....COMPLETELY ALONE. Sting rudely yells "party!" to the pilot (who's probably not even invited) and off they go to the middle of nowhere.

Vader's version of Jabba's palace is full of the cast from a 1-900-sexy-chat commercial. There's also that same midget who must have made a lot of money off of Turner. Sting is still pretty laid-back about the whole situation, perhaps he's really excited about the girl-guy ratio. But then, pimp-daddy Vader arrives.

Vader and Sting then have an impromptu strap match while one of the call-girls sensually convulses in the background.

I know Steve Borden was trying to get into acting, but this can't have been good for the demo reel.

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Top 10 Times It SUCKED To Be Sting